What Does It Take For A Woman To Be Happy? - Inspiring Insight For Your Soul and Spirit!

What does it take to make a woman happy? The same thing that it takes to make a man happy! Someone asked me the question, "What is it that you want and need to be happy in life?" My response was "To know and to live my purpose". Whether you are a man or a woman, a sense of purpose and meaning for living can contribute significantly to one's happiness.

Recently a close friend decided to take a risk and pursue her heart's desire to start her own business. She had worked unhappily in her profession for many years, but recently lost her job to downsizing.

Now armed with the expertise and the faith to follow her dream, she exuded a new confidence and enthusiasm I hadn't seen in her for a long time. Unfortunately, not everyone in her life was excited about her decision. Often those who are closest to you discourage, rather than encourage you. Usually, upon closer examination, one finds that the strongest discouragers are the ones who benefit most from where you are in life right now.

If you are not watchful, you will find that others connected to you can sway a heavy arm of influence on what you do with your time and talents. It is up to you to determine what it is that you want and need to be happy. Knowing and living your purpose is the greatest contributor to being happy in life because happiness is not externally generated, but internally motivated.

Nobody can fulfill your purpose, except you and sometimes it takes something uncomfortable to initiate positive change in our lives. When people choose to follow their hearts and stop expecting others to fulfill their needs, happiness shows up. That's true for women and men!

Gloria Thomas Anderson, MSW

Columnist of: Inspiring Insights For Your Soul and Spirit!

Inspiring hearts. Encouraging souls.

© 2006 Heart Tones

Gloria Thomas Anderson, MSW, is a motivational speaker and writer, a diversity trainer, and a professional social worker who inspires others to harness the power within themselves to create positive change in their lives. Gloria has shared her wisdom and insight on real life issues--Purpose, Relationships, and Spirituality--with hundreds of organizations and groups, including the Fellowship of Professional Women, The Executive Women in Government, Women that Soar, Women's Aglow, and Training For Excellence, Inc.

Her publication, "What Y'all Gon' Do With Me?-The African-American Spiritual and Ethical Guide to End of Life Care" was recently presented at the International First North American Spirituality and Social Work Conference, in Waterloo, Canada and published in "The Society for Spirituality and Social Work Forum". She has also received several awards and grants toward her research. Gloria is the author of the popular self-help book, Passion For Your Purpose--Discovering Peace, Direction and Balance In Your Life and columnist of Inspiring Insights For Your Soul and Spirit!

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Gloria_Thomas-Anderson

How To Be Really Happy Forever

Everyone wants to be happy, but happiness depends on many factors.

Many people believe that money brings happiness, because if they can pay and fulfil all their desires they imagine that they will be happy forever. However, money is only a facility. It cannot buy health, love and peace.

If you are sick, alone, in a war, dominated by craziness and despair, money cannot save you. It can help you find famed doctors, or paid lovers, or a false peace based on the threat of weapons, but everything you can get by paying is only an illusion. You need much more in order to feel really satisfied.

If you want to be really happy forever you have to change the world, bringing peace, abundance and happiness to Earth, besides helping humanity cultivate love, patience, goodness and humility in its heart.
You have to put an end to craziness, terrorism and despair.

If you cannot transform everything, you will never be completely happy.

So, you have either to accept to live in a crazy world full of violence and absurdity, trying to be happy on your "personal island", where only your family and your friends have importance for you, or you have to transform this crazy world into a place where everyone will have the chance to be happy, otherwise you will never be really happy too.

This is a selfish thought, but I know that you are very selfish from birth - this is why I'm explaining the truth to you in terms you can understand. You would never care for the world's pain if it didn't affect you.
I notice that each time I write an article about general happiness and the necessity to change the world so that everyone will at least have the basic conditions of life besides many things more, only a few people read my articles.

However, when I give lessons about their personal lives and how they can overcome their problems, those articles are the most often viewed.

Yes, nobody cares for the entire world. Nobody really cares for humanity.

Everyone only wants to live well, without working and only having fun. This is the ideal scenario, even though they know that things cannot be this way and they get adapted to the reality of their lives. However, their philosophy of life is the above mentioned, without a doubt.

You probably are not an exception...

Are you?

I really hope that you are, because some people are exceptions, even though they are quite rare. You will find one sensitive person that cares for the well being of the entire world, among billions and billions of alienated creatures that care only about their personal lives...

However, the truth is that the desire to be happy in such world the way it is now, with so many horrors, is in fact a crazy desire.

Don't you agree that only crazy creatures would try to be happy in a place where violence, terrorism, immorality, hypocrisy, poverty and other horrors exist?

I'm sure you do, if you are sensible. But you don't know how to change the crazy world, and you have no power...

At this point you need a miracle. And only because the miracle does exist, have I started explaining the truth in this way, otherwise I would not start showing you how absurd it is to want to be happy in a place where craziness prevails, because I would have to abandon you totally disappointed at the end of this article, while my intention is to help you solve your problems.

The miracle is inside you and sends you dreams with warnings, lessons and free psychotherapy everyday. It is the wise and saintly unconscious mind, that tries to save the human side of your conscience from the wild, primitive side that is responsible for the existence of craziness in the human mind.

If you follow the guidance you receive in your dreams, the unconscious mind will show you how you can transform your psyche, develop your personality and become a self-confident genius, so that you may be able to solve all the problems of the world, not only thanks to your intelligence, but thanks to your sensitivity and the superiority of your spirit.

Prevent Depression and Craziness through the scientific method of Dream Interpretation discovered by Carl Jung and simplified by Christina Sponias, a writer who continued Jung's research in the unknown region of the human psychic sphere.

Why It Is Important To Be Happy

 

The simple answer to this question is because it is not worth to remain moody or sad. An answer based on biological observations would be happiness trigger the production of vital hormones in the body that is crucial for overall health and metabolism. Another worthy reply to this query is happiness brings in a positive and stable mental frame of mind. But, whichever concept you endorse upon, one aspect is quite clear, being happy is many times more worthy than letting the negative emotions build in yourself.

Realistically enough, we all live in a world amidst so much of unlucky people, poverty, violence, stress, competition, and all sorts of sadness inducing environment you can think of. So it is only natural that a part of our mind always tends to carry a tinge of sadness or lean towards this negative emotion often because the natural momentum is acting in that direction.

But, being sad could leave more than a profound impact on the human body as far as its overall health is concerned. As per the latest medical researches, most cases of depression, stress, apnea, migraine, and many other diseases have its roots in the sad frame of mind.

Even the specialists treat these conditions say, one of the best medicines for these diseases are happiness, laughter and relaxation. Need any more proof to believe that it is important to be happy?

From you, the common man out there, the only possible way out of this mess is to make a mental effort by yourself - to muster the drive and power - in order to trudge your way back to happiness.

Learn to focus on better and positive things when sadness sets in, and try to convince oneself that you are still lucky and well placed than many others living in this world. Make it a habit to smile even in adversities, and avoid being alone. That is, always try to be in the company of others or engage yourself in activities that interest you to the core. Never ever let the mind wander idle.

Finally, if you are convinced that you are not able to shrug of the element of sadness fully, consider consulting a psychologist. If there is any case of a budding depression, then earlier medical intervention could set things straight. In short, try every possible step to fight off sadness, mentally or medically, whichever is required. Because, it is really important to be happy! The stakes are that high.

John Khu is an experience entrepreneur and internet marketer. He specializes in communication development and personal happiness.

Your Rules Influence How Happy and Successful You Will Become

At one time, I went on a holiday to a beautiful island. The accommodation we stayed in was good although not as luxurious as the resort nearby. The island however was beautiful, just to sit on the beach and watch the sunrise or sunset was magical.

My friend Julie who accompanied me wasn't happy doing this. Instead of enjoying her surroundings and the beauty of nature, she would watch the rich people staying at the nearby resort and envy how they lived.

Julie constantly compared herself to others who were more prosperous and she found herself and her lifestyle lacking. Julie had constant money problems and wondered why no matter how hard she worked, she never seemed to get what she really wanted.

Our perception of success or happiness is dictated by our rules, and Julie's rules implied that in order for her to be successful and happy, she had to live comfortably. These rules not only prevented her from becoming happy, they also limited her opportunities. The more rigid your rules, the harder it will be for you to achieve and be happy with your goals.

A lot of people live by the 'I'll be happy when... ' rule. They believe they will be happy when they find the right person to share their life with, when they find the right job, when they buy a home of their own, have children, or have more money. When you live by the 'I'll be happy when... ' rule you spend your life striving. It won't matter how much you achieve because it will never be enough.

Sometimes though, rules can serve us and one of mine is that I never make a decision based on fear. Many years ago when I was looking for direction in my own life, I consulted an astrologer and we became quite friendly. Later, when I bought my home I invited her to my house-warming party. She rang to say she couldn't attend and took the opportunity to berate me for buying a house.

She said, 'Anne, how could you buy a house? You know as well as anyone the financial disasters that are going to happen. How could you take on a mortgage at this time?' The disasters that she referred to were predictions of the collapse of our entire financial system, as well as a tidal wave hitting Sydney close to where I live. It hadn't even occurred to me to listen to these dire predictions. I simply followed my intuition, and many years later my home doubled in value while this woman was still renting.

There is nothing good or bad about rules; some rules will make you happy, others will make you unhappy. If you have rules, you need to be aware of them and you discover what your rules are by listening to your words. Any time you say, 'Should', 'Must', or 'Have to', you have discovered one of your rules.

Generally speaking, the more rules you have, the harder you make life for yourself and for those around you. The less 'should' in your life means less stress. That does not mean you have to give up all of your standards, just choose to make conscious choices each time rather than having a lot of blanket rules.

What Does it Mean to Be Happy?

What is happiness?  What will it take to make you happy?  People all over the world look for what it takes to make them happy in their lives, but it seems like a great many people never quite "find it."
Its my opinion that this is part of the problem.  Happiness isn't something that's found.  Happiness isn't something that finds you either.  If it is something that can be found then where it can be found might surprise you.

It's in your mind.  that's right, it can be found within the depths of your own mind.  It's a choice that you make everyday.  When you look around at your life, you make a decision about it.  You decide to be happy with it or you don't.

You can choose to look around at all the small annoyances that you that you face and decide that you because of those, you're not going to be happy.  A little secret about those little annoyances is that they're always going to be there.  No matter what you do for a living , or where you live, or how much money you have, if you choose to focus your energy on these things, you'll likely never find lasting happiness.

However on the flip side if you come to the understanding that there are always going to be those little annoyances, you'll have taken a huge first step toward becoming a happy person. 

The good thing about this is that you'll find that once you start focusing on the things in your life that make you happy, those small annoyances will become much less influential on your mind and therefore your happiness.  You'll find yourself paying more attention to the things that make you happy as opposed to the things that don't, and that will make a big difference in your life.

Justin Bott is a successful entrepreneur operating an internet marketing business. He is well versed in this field and has a keen desire to become more successful and to help others become successful as well.

As someone who's searched his entire life for success, he's studied many different programs and philosophies and brought them together to create a sustainable home-based business. Go to, to find out how he got started.

Will I Ever Be Happy Again After My Husband Walked Out?

I often hear from wives who are extremely depressed after their husband has left. Many just can not envision ever feeling happy or secure again. Common comments are something like: "last week, my husband packed his bags and walked out on me. So far, he is avoiding my calls. He ignores my texts. So I'm not able to talk to him and see what he is thinking or feeling.

The harsh reality that he might not come back is starting to creep in and this is almost more than I can bear. I just can not ever see myself being happy without him. There is no other man for me. My mom and my friends have been trying to cheer me up and get me out of the house, but I have no interest in these things.

I just don't see myself being happy unless he is my life. My mom says that one day I will move on and I will be OK. I can't ever envision this. How am I supposed to ever be happy again after he's walked out on me?" I'll try to address these concerns below.

Don't Assume The Worst Case Scenario: This wife was assuming that because her husband had been silent for a week, she had lost him forever. This was jumping to the worst case scenario. And frankly, this can be a mistake. There are occasions when men cool off once they have some time to reflect and eventually come home to their wives ready to work things out.

Sometimes, this process takes a while, but it is not uncommon. Men do sometimes come back after they walk out. I had no way of knowing if that was going to happen in this case. But I am mentioning this to let you know that you don't always have to assume that his walking out means that you are never going to get him back. Sometimes, with a workable plan, a little luck, and some patience, you can get him back.

Understand That You Are More Than Your Relationships: I find that many wives in this situation feel completely lost at the thought of not being part of a married couple. Their identity and their own happiness is tied up in their marriage and in their husband.

So when they fear that these things are going to be gone, then they equate this will the loss of their identity and their happiness. When you do this, you truly are selling yourself short. Your happiness is not dependent on your relationships. You are valuable and worthy all on your own.

Here's something else to consider. Sometimes, when we become so afraid of losing something, we become desperate and this makes us appear needy and unattractive. I mention this because it's important to understand that although it's completely natural to worried and fearful right now, sometimes if you completely give into those emotions, you will make it so that your husband is reluctant to spend time with you or interact with you because your negative emotions bring about the negativity that he's been trying to avoid all along.

The Vast Majority Of Wives In Similar Situations Will Tell You It Does Get Better: As you may have suspected, I've been through this myself. I did eventually get my husband back. But you know what? My situation did not improve until I made up my mind that I was going to dust myself off and do my best to begin to bring some happiness back into my life.

This was certainly a struggle, but I knew how easy it would be for me to sink down into a depression that would do me no good and would make my husband less likely to come around. Also, I sometimes hear back from women who have reached out to me on my blog early in the process. Some do get their husbands back, but some do not for various reasons. Even those who don't get their husbands back do eventually check in later and most are doing just fine. With time and perspective, many can look back and see that this whole thing was part of a process. This is true whether they saved their marriage or not.

The days following your husband walking out are filled with confusion, pain, and fear. In short, it is the worst of times and it can be difficult to imagine yourself happy again. But I promise you that happiness is possible, no matter what happens with your marriage.

To me, it makes sense to begin to do the things that bring you happiness, even though you don't know what tomorrow brings for your marriage. This will make day to day life easier for you and it often actually helps your marriage.

Fill your days with the people and things that lighten your load. Know that it could always be worse. Know that reaching out to others and offering help to someone else will often make you feel better right away. In short, doing those things that help you move forward are almost always the right way to go. There is no down side. Right now, it's up to your to look out for your own best interest. You deserve to be happy, no matter what your circumstances. And frankly, circumstances can change. But your happiness should not be dependent upon them.

As I said, I was filled with unhappiness in the days after my husband left. But, after a while, this just got very old. I was tired of feeling so awful all of the time. So, I turned to family and friends and I started doing things that I knew would make me feel a little better. Frankly, once I started having a brighter outlook, my husband became interested in me again.

A Life Worth Living - Expect Less Be Happy

 

I have heard and read numerous quotes throughout my life (till date) on what life is and how to live your life? How to make it happy and how to make sure you spend every moment of it? And blah, blah, blah; enough has been told. But what has influenced me most is the following line-
"EXPECT LESS and BE HAPPY"

I do not who said it nor did I make any effort to search it over internet. But these five words have influenced me so much that I cannot help but just admire the one who said it. And how true it is.

God gave us life as a human, not everybody is as lucky as we are. We all could have born as a dog, cat and any other living being you can think of other than human. But we are wasting it. Yes, we are ruining this gift of God big time. And he won't be happy about this.

We always expect- from family, friends, loved ones, God and our self. I do not say it is wrong to expect something from your near ones; after all, they are the one with who you expect to be up to your level of demands. But what's wrong is that stressing your self when those expectations are not fulfilled.

Ask a question- why are you stressing your self when others do not live up to your expectations? They never say they would do this and do that, it was all you assumed.

You assumed that they will do it. You assumed that they will do anything to make you happy. You assumed that you are special for them. You are assumed that they care for you.

Your assumptions are not too wrong but it is not their fault if they don't do what you expected. They never promised you. Expecting too much is always difficult. You are being unfair.

I believe in expecting less. In that way, I keep myself always cheerful. Low expectations from everybody, even from those who are very close to you and about whom you are sure they won't disappoint you, is a good rule to remain happy. Consider below-

You expect 9/10 for a performance, your manager thought you deserve 5 but still he gives 8. I bet you won't be happy about that because higher expectations often bring sadness than cheerfulness. In the same scenario, you deserved 5 and you know that but still you say to yourself- let me keep on lower side so I expect he will give me 4.

But manager still gives you 7. In first case, you got 8 but were not happy and in second case, you got 7 but still more than happy. It is important to be practical and realistic. Thinking without limits is very injurious to mind and heart.

That was it. I urge every one of you reading this to go deeper in the meaning of the line and start practicing it religiously. My experiences have been pleasant with it and since I have started expecting less, I am more than happy. Do not waste this God's gift, this life in sulking and complaining. It is given to you to spend in the most beautiful way and spend it that way.

I'll Be Happy When "This" Happens

"The pursuit of happiness is a most ridiculous phrase; if you pursue happiness you will never find it." -C.P. Snow, English novelist

How many times have you heard or used the expression: "I'll be happy when... "? We've all said it. I'll be happy when I have more money, when I find the perfect partner, when I change jobs, when I get a promotion, when I get a new car, when I have a new home, when I lose weight, when my child graduates, when I retire, when I live in a different location, when I can take a vacation. The list could go on and on.

And have you ever noticed how someone else's behavior can impact your happiness? I was reminded of this recently while standing at the check-out counter in the grocery store. The woman in line behind me was on her cell phone talking to a friend.

I heard her say how upset she was with all the traveling her husband had to do for his job. She remarked that he was never home and that when he was, he was too exhausted to make any plans with her. After a few more complaints, she ended by saying: "I'll be happy when he quits his job!"

I mention this because we tend to think happiness is dependent on outside circumstances, situations, events and people. We believe that bliss comes as a result of certain things happening. But we have it backwards. Happiness comes from the inside AND THEN manifests on the outside in the form of results.

We also think that other people are responsible for our happiness (or unhappiness); that what someone else does or doesn't do has a direct impact on our joy. But the truth is - happiness is a choice we make in every moment no matter what is occurring around us. It's not a destination that we reach at some point because something happens or someone does something. Happiness is a feeling that is entirely up to us and is directly related to our thoughts.

Let me share another story with you:
One of my favorite inspirational authors (Joe Vitale) posted a personal story on one of his websites. Two weeks ago his main computer crashed, his laptop stopped working, all of his websites went off line for no apparent reason, and he ended up in the hospital with emergency surgery to have his appendix removed.

Now that certainly seems like enough to make someone unhappy! And the fact is, most people would have complained about these setbacks and been really miserable. But here's what Joe said about his situation: "I didn't see the experience -- any of it -- as negative.

I was never angry, upset, fearful or any other negative emotion. I was at best curious. I'd also say it was an enforced vacation." Instead of being unhappy with all the turmoil in his life, Joe CHOSE to be curious about why he had attracted this experience and he CHOSE to be happy about having some much needed downtime.

The next time you start to say, "I'll be happy when... or I'm unhappy because... " think about this quote from Abraham Lincoln: "Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be." Don't wait for something or someone to change in the future. Make up your mind to be happy NOW and watch what unfolds!

How to Be Happy in a Bad Marriage

The idea of getting married is to fulfill that childhood fantasy that grows with us all the way into adulthood. 'And they lived happily ever after'. That was the idea when you got married I'm sure but now it's all gone. You are looking for ways on how to be happy in a bad marriage.

What you need to know is you are now looking for a solution and not the cause. So it would be wise not to point fingers. You could identify the cause but not apportion the blame. Marriage is really not a happily ever after story. Marriages involve meeting hurdles and challenges and being able get past them and move on.

If you want to know how to be a happy in a bad marriage, the first thing you both need to do is agree on one thing. That there is a problem; it needs to be solved and you are both willing to solve it. If you try to solve a marriage crisis without the involvement of your spouse you will always come out drawing the short end of the stick.

Think about the happiness that you once shared. You are still the same couple, what could have possibly gone so wrong that you cannot put that warmth back into your relationship. Remember a plant starts growing as soon as it feels a little warmth. It's the little things that matter.

Maybe you feel your spouse is now at a point where you cannot even communicate. When you try to address the problem do they become cold and evasive? Your marriage can go back to what it was or even get better. With a little help and encouragement on how you can be happy in a bad marriage; you will be amazed at the things you can turn around.

10 Things Indoor Cats Need To Be Happy

 Keeping your cat indoors is safer for a number of reasons: it minimizes its exposure to toxins as well as infections from other cats.

Preventing your pet from venturing outdoors will also protect it from getting run over or being killed by dogs or other cats. Studies show that cats kept indoors live at least twice as long as cats that are allowed outdoor access.

Keeping your cat stimulated and happy is a concern many owners have and here are 10 things you can do to ensure your indoor cat is happy and content:

1. Litter Box: Your cat's litter box should be cleaned on a daily basis with the litter changed every month. The litter box should be kept in a low traffic area so your feline feels safe when using it.

2. Good Food: Cats are carnivorous animals and should be fed high protein diets. Cheap supermarket cat food brands don't provide quality nutrients needed to maintain the health of your cat so always try to choose the best quality food you can.

3. Grass: Cats love eating grass and you should provide your kitty with the opportunity to eat grass every now and then. Special grass growing kits are available at most pet shops or you can easily grow some in a small pot.

4. Toys: Cats love to play so buy your cat some interactive toys to physically and mentally stimulate it. They are fascinated by catnip so you should try to find toys that are stuffed with this herb to attract your cats' attention.

5. Try to set aside some time every day to play with your cat, as they love a good game of chase and there are many toys available that will allow you to play with your kitty such as feline flyers and laser lights.

6. Scratching Posts: Provide your cat with a scratching post if you value your furniture. Cats love using scratching posts to keep their claws sharp as well as to mark territory.

7. Safe Area: Cats like to hide in places they feel secure so place a cat carrier or cat bed in a low traffic area of the house that your cat can go to if it wants some quiet time.

8. Visual Stimulation: Your kitty should have the opportunity to look out a window to see the outside world. A bird feeder placed within view of the window will provide your cat with endless hours of entertainment.

9. Perches: Cats love climbing and there are special perches available at pet stores that can help satisfy this instinct in your feline. Cats love observing their environment from high places and your cat will truly appreciate a perch.

10. TLC: Cats enjoy attention so be sure to indulge your kitty with a lot of tender love and care!

How to Be Happy? According to Aristotle

According to the great Greek philosopher Aristotle, we may achieve happiness by moderation. Happiness is not something you have to reach to, it is not a goal in itself, and it is not the end or destination of our daily activity. Actually, it is the activity itself. Our activity should be a happy activity. Happiness is not a fixed static condition; it is a dynamic ongoing accompaniment of our activity. It is how we do things; it is not what things bring to us.

We feel happy when we eat good tasty food in good company. We do not eat without any feeling of happiness and then at the end we feel happy. When we recall some good happy memories of good past times and we feel happy, this in itself is an activity accompanied by happiness. We have to engage in activities in our daily life to feel happy. We cannot sit down and wait for happiness to come to us.

However, people differ in what makes them happy. Someone may feel happy among crowds of people and hectic activity. Another may feel happier when he is alone or in a quiet peaceful environment. There is no fixed formula or a prescription to tell people how to get happiness. We can only achieve happiness by trial and error. If a certain situations or activities make us happy, that is how to achieve happiness. However, what makes you happy may seem unpleasant to me.

Does this mean that there are no rules and people can decide for themselves what sort of activity to make for being happy? Is this unrelated to the impact of such activity on other people and on the individual's own future happiness?

Aristotle has introduced the principle of the golden mean. By this, he implies a certain degree between two extremes. It does not mean the middle or average value. Someone may find that he feels happy to eat as much as he wants, may end up suffering unhappiness in the future. Moderation is the way to strike a balance between current happiness and future outcomes.

The moderate pleasures are those, which would make you happy now and will not make you suffer in the future or make other people suffer because of your behaviour. That moderate degree is different among different people. Some people may need to eat more than others and many do not feel happy when they sense they are bloated and obese. What is good for one person may not be good for another. We cannot prescribe how much activity a person should do to make him happy. We have to take in consideration individual variations and choices.

The moral philosophy of Aristotle considers what is ethical and moral and what is unethical and evil. It looks at how much pleasure and happiness a particular behaviour would bring to the majority of people and to the persons involved. Sometimes we cannot decide by rational thinking alone if certain behaviour would lead to happiness or unpleasantness. Trial and error may lead us to know which behaviour to choose. We do need to learn from others' experiences.

A certain amount of experimentation would help us know how to be sure of our choices. A well documented and evidenced scientific knowledge may also provide us with warning signs about the future consequences of a certain current happy behaviour.

Some of our behaviours which makes us happy may make others would suffer. This is not ethical in any logical argument. A certain degree of self-control and restraint on unethical behaviour is needed. The government or the state enforce law and order to prevent unchecked hedonism from inflicting pain and suffering on others.

Moral education is needed for the young to develop a sense of moral judgement and to develop self-control. Some people by nature are morally weak or lack self-control. Self-discipline is a crucial element to achieve happiness for the individual and for the group.

How to Be Happy in Spite Of Your Circumstances

 

It is so easy, almost natural, to get caught up in self-pity and despair when things are going wrong in your life, but you can be happy in spite of your circumstances. The choice is yours to be more powerful than any circumstances in your life.

It can simply be a matter of perspective. You can choose to live each moment to its fullest. If you knew you didn't have a tomorrow, would today's problems really be as bad as they seem now? If this was your last day, wouldn't you want to spend it feeling happy and fulfilled?

You can always find the blessing in any situation if you look for it. Every situation in life, regardless of how tragic it may seem, is an opportunity to learn and grow. If you look for these opportunities you will become a better person because of your struggles.

Sometimes, you just have to let things go. If you are completely miserable at your job, it is time to find a new one. This applies to the people in your life as well. If you have a miserable person in your life, get rid of them. If it is a family member, at least limit the amount of time you spend with them. Life is just too short to be stuck hanging around with miserable people in a miserable environment.

Don't let others decide how you are going to be. If you get into a traffic accident and the other driver is yelling and cursing at you, you have a choice.

You can either stoop to his level by engaging in similar negative behavior, or you can be polite and maintain the positive attitude you had before the accident. Someone else's attitude does not have to become your own and ruin your entire day. You and only you have complete control over your emotions.

Life is full of precious moments; you get to choose how you are going to feel in every moment. You can concentrate on what is wrong, or your can be grateful for all of the blessings around you. You have clothes on your back, food on your table and air in your lungs, and there are many people in this world who don't. Make the choice to be happy and celebrate the absolute abundance that flows in your life.

How To Be Happy Under Stress

With the stress that has become the part and parcel of our life today, it has become imperative for us to know how to be happy. It can be easily achieved by a simple smile.

The old adage, Smile and the world smiles with you holds true even today. Or it may touch us through our relationships and love of work. Anything that gives us comfort or pleasure will teach us how to be happy.

We constantly devise methods of how to be happy. Razor-edge competition and fast paced economy leaves us with little time for ourselves. We are caught up in the rat race to win, compete, fight, and run. And in this race we forget how to be happy.

As we gradually begin to grow; wishing how to be happy in our hearts; we keep losing a track of our happiness in day to day living. Mental stress gets an aggressive hold over our lives ruled by bad health, troubled relationships, peer pressure, social responsibilities, work place conflicts, monetary problems and the never ending ambition.

The stress which drives us up the wall has taken its toll our lives both physically as well as mentally. Physically, the widely known symptoms are high blood pressure, insomnia, boredom, lack of hunger and reduced immune strength. It causes an infinite number of mental disorders like schizophrenia, depression, manic depression or severe malaise. Not even the foetus is safe. The cortisol linked to the weight of the baby, may be a potential mechanism for transmitting the mother's stress to her unborn baby.

There should be ways to decipher how to be happy under stress. The easiest way is to try to absorb only the positive moments of our lives. Search for happiness in the everyday simple events of your life. Know how to be happy with the today's achievements without self-criticism and lack of appreciation. You can de-stress simply by:-

a)Thinking of the happy memories.
b)Taking time out to build beautiful memories today.
c)Dwell your thoughts in the aroma of your favorite flower.
d)Talk to someone when any thought keeps haunting you.
f)Stop. Take a break. Breath in, breath out.
g)Organize your thoughts

If you want to know how to be happy in spite of misery and failure, always look towards finding the solution to the situation at hand instead of dwelling over it. There is a highly effective technique for instant relief from stress. Find the humor in the contents.

But, it requires a brave heart to laugh over misfortune or at oneself.
The most important driving factor is your self-determination. It is when we search deep within ourselves we realize that we have the innate strength invested by Mother Nature to fight stress. And if you are still puzzled in the quest of how to be happy, just smile.

How To Be Happy At Work

 

The best way to maximize your productivity on the job is to be happy at work. No other factor comes close to giving you the boost in efficiency than really enjoying your work.

There are dozens of practices you can do to boost your productivity while at work. These include better planning, writing better to do lists, spending less time on your email, keeping meetings short, etc.
However, none of these things measures up to the effect that happiness has on our productivity.

• Happy people accomplish more on the job.
• Happy people are more creative. If one is in a good mood, creative thoughts flow much better.
• Happy people fix problems more readily instead of complaining about them.
• Happy people are more optimistic; they accomplish more and are more successful.
• Happy people have more energy and therefore get more done.
• Happy people get sick less often. They are less vulnerable to stress and burnout.
• Happy people are more relaxed, and they learn faster and become more productive employees.

It is important that the employer creates an environment for the employee to function at peak efficiency. Sometimes a person has many jobs that could be divided with other employees.

Nora talked with her boss and they decided to give some routine duties to Sarah, who had a lighter work load. As a result, Nora was free to do more creative work, and her overall productivity skyrocketed.

Fun is underrated in the workplace. A good manager creates opportunities to have fun. It can be pizza in the staff room, ice cream in the park, or a boat ride on a lake. It does not have to be anything fancy. The purpose is to create a chance to relate in a different way. People will find common interests when they have time to talk in a relaxed atmosphere.

When a team has accomplished a long term goal together, it is really healthy to have a party to celebrate. It serves as a milestone. Members reinforce the idea that all of us are in this company or department together. The leader has an opportunity to congratulate everyone for their hard work.

How do you get happy on your job? There are dozens of things you can do. You need to decide to be a happier person. No one can do this for you. It is definitely up to you, and the rewards are well worth the effort.

How To Be Happy - Happiness Benefits

Benefits? Isn't that enough to be happy in itself?

Well yes, that is, but you might consider all the consequences of being happy.

People usually think that happiness encompass all the good feeling, it is a bit too simplistic.

Let's make a list and go through the points in more details.

Of course this list is not exhaustive; it is only a reflection of what I can think of at the moment of the writing of this article.

• Friends
Yes, exactly, friends. That emotional feeling of happiness is contagious! The happier you are, the more people will enjoy sticking around with you. You become enjoyable, a model! People want to know you achieve that well-being state, want advices from you. You will always find people that won't like you. Whatever your mind-state, those people will just be jealous! 

Yes, jealous. That's so easy to be jealous, and that's even easier to find excuses for us. "He had far more opportunities than I had", "My dog died, it was very hard", etc... You don't need that kind of acquaintance; they will just try to diminish you in the eyes of your true friends. Well you could always try to 'convert' them, but that is only if you have time to waste! 

• Wealth
Money! It is no magic, it won't just appear out of nowhere in your pocket or bank account! You will still have to work! But tell me, have you already noticed the difference between working when you were feeling great and working when you were sad or very disappointed. The difference in results was HUGE! Now let's try a little exercise, imagine if you were always very happy, you would always perform superbly! You'd be eager to do even more, you'd feel unstoppable. Welcome to the first stage of successful people. 

• Health
We are not only a mind, we also are a body! Those 2 things are much linked! What you mind think, the body kind of materializes! (No you can't generate gold that way!). Now take a hypochondriac. That sort of person who thinks he/she is always sick? Know what they will get sick! They are only asking their body to match their state of mind! 

 On the other side, happy people never think about disease! If it has to happen it will happen, meanwhile I don't have to 'pray' for it to come faster (by always thinking about it). Happy people are healthier people! Let's step a bit further: Studies proved than happy people lived longer than unhappy people. That gives even more reason to be happy. You will be able to share with your family some more year than expected by the statistics! 

• Success
Success is different than wealth. You don't have to be wealthy to feel successful. As long as things go as you have planned, you are successful enough! People will try to judge you, compare you with others. It doesn't matter! If you feel you are doing well, you are successful! 

• Spirituality
Hum, generally, wealth and spirituality do not go well together right? False! This is a misconception! You can be wealthy and be very spiritual! I'd say it can even be easier to become spiritual when you have the money. Why? You don't have to work; it gives you more time to devote to your study/practice. You don't have to worry about having enough money to pay the bills. That gives you an inner peace which is mandatory to reach a good level of spirituality. You could pay expensive teacher, and get the best training, instead of relying on some local flaky 3 days training guru's wannabe.

After having seen all those benefits, nobody would want to be miserable. Actually almost everybody would like to be happy. Some people still prefer to live miserably. Why you ask? Because it is easier! Everybody is supporting you, you have excuses for everything, and you have far less responsibilities!

Now What To Do ?
Finding its way out to happiness is certainly not easy, well, for most people.
Methods have been developed, tools have been created to help you reaching such state.
Actually, too many tools have been developed and people are getting lost finding the good one.

How to Be Happy - Eat Cake! - 1 More Best Of

An excuse to eat more cake is finally here, cake makes you happy! If you thought cake was bad for your health, then think again! The good news is moderate quantities of some types of cake are actually good for your mood and so may benefit your overall health.

Research in to some of the main ingredients of cake, show that eating those foods and so eating cake, affects your mood in a positive way. Milk, cream, butter and even bananas contain a naturally occurring chemical called tryptophan, which helps the brain produce serotonin - the hormone responsible for making us feel happy and calm.

Chocolate contains anadamine a chemical which is now known as a mood enhancer. Coffee increases the brain's production of dopamine which makes us feel good. Nuts contain selenium and omega 3 fats which improve blood flow to the brain and lift our moodSugar boosts endorphins which help to make us feel elated.

So it would seem, a slice of rich chocolate and banana cake or a piece of decadent coffee and walnut cake would be the ideal way to boost your mood.

Cake also has a psychological effect on the brain, due to its association with happy events. We usually consume cake on happy and/or special occasions, particularly as children, when we eat cake as adults it gives us that happy feeling from our childhood.

All of this is great news for those already partial to a piece of cake, and may go some way to explaining why Friday cake clubs are on the increase in offices throughout the UK. Personally I think Monday cake club would be better as it would give us all something to look forward to after the weekend!

How To Be Happy And Enthusiastic About Your Life

It's important for our happiness that we stay vital and enthusiastic about our life. When we are interested and engaged in all parts of it then our life has a sense of wholeness and integrity and this supports our happiness.
We can get stuck in our lives, lose our enthusiasm and question who we are and our worthiness. But we can learn to shift this 'stuckness' and keep our energy clear and bright. This keeps us positive more of the time and leads to greater health and happiness.
We live in an ocean of energy and we receive and transmit energy within this ocean. When we are feeling vital, happy and enthusiastic, this positive energy ripples out from us and touches others we come into contact with. We never quite know the effect that this has on those around us but we can get some idea if we think about how others affect us.
Remember a time when someone praised you or treated you with generosity of spirit or in a caring and compassionate way. Think back to how this made you feel, and how that feeling rippled out and touched others that you came into contact with.
Now remember a time when you were really hurt by someone else, by their lack of consideration, smallness, selfishness, lack of care or empathy. And remember the energy of the ripples that went out from you after that.
If you are to sustain your happiness then you need to learn to change the negative, life diminishing energies and 'stuck' moods that we sometimes find ourselves in. With practice can learn to do this with fluidity and agility and restore our happiness.
Practice sending out positive and life affirming ripples of energy as you go about your day. Notice whether you are smiling or frowning. Look at others who you pass. If they are smiling, how does this make you feel?
There are many ways you can send out positive ripples. Try starting a conversation with someone on a bus or a supermarket checkout person. Not a complaining or moaning type of conversation. Find something to be grateful about and share this. Or praise or complement someone. And stay open to those positive ripples coming back to you.
Notice how your happiness has a positive impact in the world. All of us would much rather spend our time with happy people than unhappy people. See that your happiness is a gift you give to the world.

How to Be Happy at Work - Some Small Things That Can Help You Stay Happy in the Workplace

The workplace is one place that you spent most of your time everyday and of course, it matters a lot if you are happy at work. If not, you'll end up tired and drained each day. If you want to spend each day happy and fulfilled, here are some tips on how to be happy at work.

1. Start with making yourself organized at work. Clutter brings in more stress and disorganization in your work and that can contribute to being unproductive, unfulfilled and less happy.

Start with your office space or your desk. Organize your schedules, have a planner, use post-its and reminders, organize your tools at work - whatever it is that is applicable to you, it pays to be clean and organize in your workspace.

2. Be with positive people in the workplace. It is sometimes unavoidable to see some negative people at work, people who get into your nerves, pessimistic workmates, whiners, and those who just love to meddle into the affairs of others.

If you choose to go with them, you will eventually become one of them, so try to be with positive ones. If you can't avoid the negative co-workers, at least, condition your mind on how to react positively and deal with them nicely. After all, being happy is your own choice. You can be happy if you choose to.

3. Throw in some fun in the workplace. You can add a little humor with your emails or add cartoon sketches with your fax that can make your colleagues smile... little things like this can help lighten up the mood in the workplace. Instead of talking behind other's backs, you can also try to lighten up lunch times by talking about some funny things and thoughts - but of course, don't laugh at your co-workers.

4. Manage your time and your work. If you think you have been working long hours routinely and there seemed to be no time for you to think about anything aside from work, then you might want to manage your time well.

One of the important tips on how to be happy at work is to be able to do your work effectively and on time. Mismanagement of your time will surely put you in stressful situations at work. If the reason is that, you have too much to do than what you can take, then learn to delegate or ask for extension of deadlines - but you have to prioritize your work above all.

5. Reward yourself. If you want to learn how to be happy at work, you have to also give yourself a break and find ways to reward yourself sometimes. Have a makeover, go shopping, enjoy a night out with friends and colleagues, or take a yoga class - enjoying activities like this as part of your week can help you break the monotony and help you get rid of stress at work.

Indeed, you can learn ways on how to be happy at work. Keep in mind that you may not be able to change the some situations at work, nor the attitude of your co-workers, but you can choose to be happy despite that, by simply choosing to be happy - and that means changing how you deal with all these.

The 10 Secrets of a Happy Relationship

 The statistics on relationships are depressing: in California
alone, the average marriage lasts just 5 years. Nationwide,
43% of marriages end within 15 years. Second and third
marriages end in divorce 60-70% of the time. Clearly, how we
handle our relationships is not working.

And yet, 94% of young
adults in one study said that having a good marriage is
extremely important to them. So, what can you do?
We researched much of current the literature on relationships
and have condensed the results into just a few key concepts.

These principles seem to be the common denominators in
happy, successful marriages. See how many you can identify
in your relationship.

1. It starts with you

To paraphrase Abraham Lincoln, you are as happy as
you make up your mind to be. Research has shown that
happiness is a state of being, not of having or doing or
achieving. Nor is happiness a destination. People often
say, "I just want to be happy" or "I just want to have a
happy marriage" as if that is a future goal or place in
time. The problem is, they never get there. That's
because the future is... in the future. And the only true
destination is your final day on earth. And then it's too
late. So make the decision to be happier starting today.

There's a relationship benefit as well. The happier you
are with yourself and your life, the more attractive you
are to your partner. Another way to look at this is: if you
were someone else, would you marry you? Start today to
work on being the kind of person you would want to
know, to date, and to marry. If you're not that kind of
person now, how can you expect your spouse to stay
attracted or stay passionate?

2. There's you, there's him/her, and then there's "we".

You don't have to give up your identity or be known
solely as your spouse's partner.

It also doesn't work when two people each do their own
thing without regard to their partner's wishes and
feelings. Marriage is, and should be, more than
cohabitation. As the marriage vows state, "two shall be
as one". That "one" is neither you nor him. The "one" is
a third entity: the relationship, the marriage, the "we".

The "we" is what you share, what you have in common,
the support and nurturing that you cannot give yourself.
Think companionship, intimacy, and sharing.

3. You leave behind your emotional baggage

Are you really over your previous relationship? If not, you
can't fully commit to your spouse. Likewise, if you are
still Daddy's little girl or Mommy's boy, you are not in
control of your own life. Therefore, you cannot fully enter
into an adult relationship of mutual sharing and support.
You can't be accountable to your spouse if you still have
to please Mommy or Daddy.

You can't reach new heights as a person as long as
you're dragging around your emotional suitcases. And,
it's not fair to your partner. If you're dating but not in a
committed relationship right now, consider a time out
while you unpack those bags and resolve those issues
that keep you from being your own man or woman. If
you are committed, a relationship coach can help you
stow your baggage so you can be there completely for
your partner.

4. The marriage comes first

Marriage is supposed to be the strongest bond between
two people. Parents come and go; children grow and
leave. Your spouse is only person to stay with you the
rest of your time on this planet.

Women who say their children come first, usually can
never let the children grow up and become independent
adults because then the primary relationship in these
women's lives would end. So the children never
emotionally leave home and are forever dependent on
the parent. This delights the women because they are
not willing to have their children grow up emotionally and
become independent adults.

Women who say their children come first also seem so
surprised when their mates eventually decide to leave for
someone else who WILL put them first. And finally, when
children are the center of a women's life, and the
children eventually leave, the woman typically feels lost.
Her reason for existing the last 18-22 years has just
moved out. And if she should turn to her partner after a
20 year emotional abscense, it's like going to your high
school reunion. You used to know them but its not the
same now because they've changed.

When partners put the marriage first, friends, relatives,
and acquaintances are still important but they're not
primary. The man and woman, as the principals in the
relationship, are the combined heads of their household.
As such they look to eath other-and no one else-for their
primary comfort and support.

5. Your marriage is your top priority.

You didn't get married to commute two hours a day,
work at the office 60 hours a week, and pay on a
mortgage for 30 years, did you? You probably got
married to share your life-not your bills-with that special
someone. During life's ups and especially during life's
downs, keep in mind why you married in the first place.
It wasn't so you could get a better job, buy a better car,
or obsess over your favorite sports team. Once upon a
time, your partner was the most important thing in this
world to you. If you value your relationship, he or she
still is. Start acting like it again today and every day.

6. Don't compare

This holds true in your life as well as in your marriage.
There will always be a couple that seems happier,
wealthier, sexier, and more perfect than you two are. So
what? Their happiness doesn't increase or diminish your
happiness. Neither does their money, their jobs, their
house, or their prettiness. All that matters is whether you
for you.

7. Don't wonder "what if?"

Wondering what it would be like to be with another
person-for a night or for a lifetime-is self-delusion and is
really unfair to your spouse. You see other people
socially when they are at their best. You see your spouse
when he/she is at his best, her average, and sometimes
at her worst. If you could swap mates, guess what?
You'd see that person at his/her worst, and you probably
wouldn't like what you see. You already have a lot
invested in your partner. Take care of that investment.
The payoff is usually greater than starting all over again.

8. Realize that love can grow.

As much as you were in love when you got married, your
love and commitment to each other can grow over the
years. Despite all the old married jokes and cliches,
marriage can get better, not worse, with time. The
longer you've been married, the more history you have
together.The triumphs and disappointments, the
successes and the failures, all are part of sharing a life
together. And that history is unique to you. No one else
has that or can duplicate it. This is why a man who
leaves his middle aged wife for a younger woman
eventually wants to come back. With his wife he has a
history-a shared past. With the new woman there is only
the present. Leaving his wife permanently is like leaving
himself behind as well. Since she is a part of his past,
she is the best person to be a part of his future.

9. Commitment means "no matter what".

It's as simple as making the decision to be totally
committed to your spouse and to the relationship. No
matter what happens: financially, health wise, or
otherwise. No matter what. Once the two of you have
decided to stay "no matter what", there is no question of
stay or go, yes or no.

Write this down: "ALL RELATIONSHIPS HAVE ISSUES".
Happy relationships always have issues. Unhappy
relationships certainly have issues. It's just that in happy
relationships, the couples identify the issues, negotiate
the issues, and come to terms with the issues. Couples
in unhappy relationships deny, ignore, put up, or run
away.
Once the two of you have made the decision "no matter
what" the emphasis is on the we. And, since we is not
you and not him, the only positions "we" have are the
ones you've decided together. In short, all problems are
negotiable because there are no his problems or her
problems. When one partner has a problem, just having
the problem should be a problem for the other partner.
Therefore, all problems are shared problems. Their
problems require their solutions.

10. Believe that a happy marriage is not only possible, it's
yours for the making.

It won't happen by itself. It takes intention, commitment,
and practice. But the many couples who have happy,
blissful, and satisfying marriages are proof that it is
possible. Just choose to be happy, and choose to be
happily married.
Yes, you'll still have to work at it. But the rewards are so
much greater than the effort. Besdies, being single and
looking takes effort; being divorced and looking again
takes effort. Spend the effort inside your marriage and
stay married. Happily married.

How to Be Happy in Life - Important Things That Can Make You Happy in Life

Sometimes we come to a point of pondering about how to be happy in life. Sometimes we desperately chase something because we think that can make us happy but at times we still end up unhappy and not contented.

Indeed, we may not even know what can make us happy and some of us may believe that being unhappy in life is something that is destined for them. However, we can be truly happy if we believe we can. Here are some things that you may be ignoring but can make you happy and some strategies to help you achieve happiness.

- Know what you want in life and what you love doing. Your interests and passion in life are among the things that can give you happiness and fulfillment and thus, for as long as you give time to do what you want and enjoy your passion, you can be happy in life.

- Visualize the things that can make you happy. Having a mental image of whatever it is that can make you happy will help you condition your subconscious on being happy and boosting your mood as well.

- Take care of your health. It is often hard to be happy if your physical self is not well. Loose extra weight if you are overweight or obese, have a healthy diet, cut down on bad eating habits and do exercise. Of course, poor nutrition can be a factor to your bad mood. Keep in mind that the healthier you are, the easier you can learn how to be happy in life.

- Go with positive people. They most likely are happy ones. Get rid of negatives in life and avoid negative people as much as you can. Being negative can influence you and may lead you to being unhappy. If you can't get away with dealing with negative people especially if it happens in the workplace, then you can choose how to react to them and stay away from being angry or irritated.

- Do your share. Another thing that you can do to learn how to be happy in life is to do your share. Many troubles start from people not doing their share - so if you want to be happy for yourself and for others, then you can start now by doing your share.

- Take time to appreciate nature. The power of nature indeed includes the power to make us feel light, easy and happy, thus if you have the blues, go out and enjoy walking in the park or spending time to appreciate the beauty of nature.

- Give and share. One great way on how to be happy in life is to give and share to others what you have. Giving is indeed a wonderful way to make others happy and at the same time making yourself happy too.

- Stop comparing yourself to others. The more you compare, the more you will end up frustrated, envious and jealous, and these can make you less happy.
Start with these simple tips and you'd surely discover that little things can be great ones especially in learning how to be happy in life.

Happy From the Inside Out

"The joy I have - the world didn't give it, the world can't take it away." - Shirley Caesar, gospel singer
Sally, age 35, has true clarity that happiness comes from the Inside Out and she makes it her highest priority to be happy regardless of circumstances. The more she practices looking inside for her happiness, the more happiness, freedom and empowerment she feels. As she continues to develop her capacity to be happy on the inside regardless of conditions on the outside, the more her external conditions bring her reasons to be happy. While Sally knows that happy circumstances cannot make her truly happy, she proves every day that being happy can and does create happy circumstances.

Sam, also 35, is externally focused. He seeks gratification from the environment and other people. This works well when he receives the external gratification he desires, but this is not a good long-term strategy. As he continues looking outside for his happiness, he is becoming less happy, less free and less empowered. His attempts to impress other people by driving the hottest car and wearing the trendiest clothes lead to mounting debt and increasing stress. As Sam becomes more dependent, needy, and uncertain, he tries to fill the emptiness inside with drugs, alcohol and sex.
These are extreme examples, to be sure. However, some form of these stories is actually the way it plays out for most people. When you realize that you can be happy whether you're rich or poor, married or single, healthy or ill, you realize it's not the stuff, it's not other people and it's not the circumstances that determine your level of happiness.

So, if "the stuff" won't make you happy, what to do? Feel Good First! It's happiness you really want anyway. And, when you're happy, all the stuff comes as a nice byproduct.
It was this quote that woke me up and enabled me to create a successful coaching business:
"The standard of success in life is not the things or the money. The standard of success is absolutely the amount of joy you feel." - Abraham-Hicks
I had been working with an Outside In perspective, mistakenly believing I would be happy when I had a full schedule of ideal clients and was making good money. With this guidance, I was able to quit waiting for external circumstances to make me feel the way I wanted to feel. When I made it a priority to feel good from the Inside Out, my circumstances shifted to match my vibrations. Then, and only then, was I able to attract the clients and the business I desired. It was simply not going to happen as long as I needed the circumstances to change before I could feel good.
"The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts." - Marcus Aurelius
The one and only thing that determines the way you feel is the thoughts you choose to think. It's your thoughts that make you feel good or bad - nothing else.

You can choose thoughts that make you feel happy and empowered or thoughts that make you feel sad and powerless. You have the choice in every moment. And, as you choose your thoughts, you choose your life. 

Happiness really IS an inside job. Where you gonna look?

To Be Happy, Create New Brain Pathways

A lady came to me with a hurt wrist. She was amazed at the instantaneous healing that took place. Called it a miracle that her wrist-which had hurt for months-no longer hurt. Three days later she called and said, "I thought you healed my wrist. Here it is only three days later and it hurts again. You didn't do a very good job. Now what do you have to say about that?"

I answered her by asking, "Why did you take the pain back?"

You want to be happy? Then why do you keep taking the unhappiness back? You are the one who is responsible for that, not the other one you keep blaming. Tough to hear, but to be happy you must stop taking back the unhappiness. So how do you do this?

Think of unhappiness as a groove worn into your brain from a constant flow of unhappy thoughts like a creek worn from water erosion. As humans we tend to like-and return too-the familiar, even if that which is familiar is painful. By now, you may have a Grand Canyon of unhappiness pattern that you will fall back into without even realizing it. The good news is that once you stop digging the unhappiness groove deeper and create a new pattern of happiness then happiness becomes the familiar groove and is easier to access and "fall" into.
To help create those happiness groves, become the high witness to your life and become aware of what you are creating for yourself in your life. This is a process that takes dedication that comes from your desire to be happy. No one can give you the desire to be happy except you. Happiness, like most things in life, comes to us as we seek it out. We have to do the work to find it.

Try this: On a sheet of notebook paper, begin to write down a reason you have to be happy. If you can't find a reason to be happy, start with a reason to be grateful. If you are so unhappy you can't find a reason to be grateful, your addiction to unhappiness is greater than you desire to be happy, and it may behoove you to seek help from a professional therapist. This process only works if you are able and ready to do the work.
Once you have completed the first reason you have to be happy, continue on to a second reason that you have to be happy. When any reason for unhappiness comes to mind-and they will-turn the paper over and write down that reason, and then immediately turn the paper over again and continue writing down reasons why you are-or should be-happy.

You will notice that as you begin this process you may not particularly feel happy about any of the reasons you have for happiness. They are reasons you have to be happy, but you may take them for granted and not feel happiness from them. As you continue to write, you will notice a lifting of your mood. Keep writing until you actually feel light, happy, and maybe even positively giddy. Repeat this process whenever you feel a need to do so or when you slip into unhappiness.

10 Reasons Why You Should Always Be Happy

Never forget that "the more you put out, the more you receive". Some times appearances can be deceiving. If you appear to be in a mess of some sort, whether from a relationship or finances, don't let yourself get too lost. Remember that there is always a way out, even if it's something as simple as smiling and being grateful.

You will only be able to get out of the mess if you truly believe that you can. Just remember the following 10 tips:

The world is happy when you are happy.

Smile at the world, and the world will smile back.

Be thankful that you are alive to experience this day, and you will be given more days to be thankful for.

The universe reflects back to you what you put out to the universe.

Be thankful for yesterday, and be happy today.

Be happy today, and prosper tomorrow.

You don't need money to be happy, only a smile.

Your dreams will come true, but first you must be true to yourself.

Share love and smiles with others, and the world will share with you in return.

Next time some thing bad happens, ask yourself "What did I do to contribute to this, and what can I do to make things better?" Apologize to the world for the part you played in messing things up, even if you don't feel it was your fault. Apologize to yourself as well, and then forgive yourself. Now all you can do is start all over again. There is no use having any bad feelings, for that will just dig you even deeper into the hole. Smile and be happy, and you will quickly find your way out.

The Definition of Happiness

The word happy is continuously used to describe the quality of what we want in our lives. The interesting thing is that when asked to outline our terms of happiness, we struggle to provide actual DETAILS. Why? Because the term happiness is used as a generic ideal, a concept or quality that we believe we can construct out of external circumstances.

Happiness is NOT a concept or quality. Happiness IS an emotional state. Certainly external circumstances can elicit the emotional state of happiness, but the idea that our external circumstances will give us a quality of life called "happiness" is counterintuitive. In fact, more often than not we are our own barriers to this very healthy and positive emotion.

This could be because our day-to-day emotional baseline may be residing primarily in the negative. Our baseline can best be described as the state we are most familiar and comfortable with emotionally. We are creatures of adaptation and even emotional states become habitual patterns. So naturally if our experiences elicit a more positive or "happier" state, our subconscious will look for the loophole and convert us back to that comfortable baseline, in this case a more negative state. This explains why pessimistic feelings can appear seemingly out of nowhere, following the experience of something positive.

So what to do if you discover you are habituated in a more negative state? Well, you must LEARN to become comfortable with the REGULAR presence of the emotional FEELING of happiness. It is actually necessary to train yourself to become familiar with the regularity of a more positive state. Consider it a happiness bootcamp.

By gradually increasing the frequency of feeling happy, you become more comfortable residing in this state. In other words you are creating a habit of feeling happy. The first step in training yourself is to determine what circumstances elicit feelings of happiness. Take note of where you are, what you are doing and who is around you. The next step is then to design your future circumstances accordingly.

It is important to note that just like training our bodies at the gym, these happiness training habits require persistence. Success does not happen overnight. The good news is that you can change.

There may be times when, despite your greatest effort, you discover that you are stuck in a negative habitual pattern. This is when it may be helpful to seek out resources in the form of a coach, counselor, therapist or group. Support is always useful when making ANY changes in life. So share your goal and make happiness your new habit!

Why Learning Famous Quotes on Happiness Can Make For a More Joyful Life

What is happiness that people would do anything to pursue it? Does it have to do with having plenty of houses, clothes, cars, and money? Or does one have to be rich and famous to be happy? Happiness it would seem is a fragile thing and something that nobody can define in exact terms.

Many people have different definitions for happiness. Some would define it as possessing riches and material things. Others would define it as a state of mind. A few would define it as something that they choose to be. People want and long to be happy. They do not want to be unhappy.

While happiness is something people want, it is very difficult to find it. However, there are some things or actions that one can do to help. One of these is to always think positive. Another way is to look at famous quotes on happiness. These sayings teach people the basic elements needed for a joyful life. If we look at some famous sayings, a common thing found is that it is a state of the mind and a choice.

One saying by Abraham Lincoln for example in essence states that people are as happy as they want to be. If one thinks about it, this simply means that a person has to take positive action to achieve the state of happiness and it is their personal choice as to how happy or joyful they want to be. It is decision that one has to take to become joyful. Other "adages" point to the fact that it is a person's selfish desires and self-centeredness that cause unhappiness.

At the same time, some sayings would remind people that it is important to have a healthy lifestyle so that physical wellbeing is not compromised. A person cannot be happy if they do not feel well. Taking care of oneself is the best way to be healthy.

Still other sayings would urge people to look for activities that they find interesting. It is said that this can contribute to one's happiness as well since it promotes a sense of satisfaction by keeping the person's mind preoccupied. It is also said that music is a big help to people who are in distress whether physically or emotionally. Music can provide relief and allows a person to feel good.

Because people thrive on having inspirations, read up on these quotes and one is sure to find some sayings that will help them find happiness. Apply the quote as a principle or use the saying as a motto. It can change a person's perspective on things. After all, being happy is really a choice.